Can't Touch That

I have one fan and she's a witch. Last night I told her to fly around the Web and look for any hate that people were writing about me.

"Okay, Tarquin," she cackled and jumped on her broom.

There was a full moon, but the only hate she could find were the 960 hater blogs that belong to me. Bummer.

Adminstrator's note: "The Thing" is no longer playing.

Turn Left at Busy Street

Today I was extremely busy. I shopped for holiday decorations, bought another camera, wrote on my blogs and emailed some dum dums.

Countdown to Halloween!

This is my annual Halloween blog. For all my fans who can't get enough of me, I still have several hate sites.